Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Kara you look great!

I was at a friend's 40th birthday party on Saturday night. Truth be told, I was apprehensive about going to the party in the first place. Of course I wanted to celebrate my friend's birthday milestone, but I also knew that three people from high school were also going to be there. People I haven't seen since graduation 22 years ago.

Twenty two years ago when I was a whole lot smaller.

I had a great time. I chatted with a group of other mothers, we swapped kid, house, work and commuting stories. I nibbled at the vegetable tray. I caught up with one of the girls from high school; towards the end of the night I talked to the other girl.

"Kara you look great!"

Immediately I give her a funny look; my eyes narrow and I tilt my head. I haven't seen this woman in 22 years, I'm half a person heavier than I was in high school and the first thing she tells me is that I look good?

"So Kara, when are you due?"

My lips tighten. I feel slightly embarrassed. I'm totally annoyed.

I tell her that I'm not pregnant.

She had the good sense to look mortified. She noticed that I wasn't drinking alcohol so she thought that I was pregnant. I'm sure my larger size also helped her to come to this conclusion.

"No May, I just don't drink any more." For some reason, I felt compelled to add: "My weight was fine until I had kids." (This statement was mostly true; my weight fluctuated greatly before pregnancy, but my weight exploded during the two pregnancies. Right now, I'm approximately 30 pounds away from my pre-pregnancy weight.)

"Oh, so when did you have kids?"

I give her a strangled look. It's not lost on me the fact that she focused on how recently I was pregnant rather than asking about my actual children (hey - how many kids do you have? How old are they?)

"You're killing me May. Really, just killing me. They are two and four years old."

I have to admit the more she put her foot in her mouth the funnier the situation seemed to get. We were laughing at the end of our exchange over our mutual embarrassment.

Good times, good times.

So what is the moral of the story? If you see someone for the first time in twenty years and there is a possibility that you may look pregnant, just have a glass of wine to eliminate confusion.


  1. Ugh. Just ugh.

    Lucky you that you only have to see the Mays of the world once in a blue moon. I feel sorry for her.

    Wish I knew of a cleanser strong enough to scrub that one out.

  2. I carried almost all my excess weight on my torso. People assumed I was pregnant ALL THE TIME.

    Oprah says one should not assume someone is pregnant unless they see the baby's head crowning.

    Amen to that.

  3. I have an uncanny ability to know when women are pregnant well before they are showing, and even once before the woman herself knew she was pregnant!

  4. It's great that you can find the humor in this. There are so many out there that couldn't.


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